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A Letter to Valentine

Dear (Alleged) Valentine,

I don't understand; you stick to me like a bloody tapeworm like how dust settles onto everywhere. Roses aren't red, and violets aren't blue; I wish you could just disappear or go find somebody else for a change. Please don't look at me like that, because I would so barf my intestines out. Argh, what a day! I prefer solitude than having to brave couples declaring their love for each other within an immeasurable radius. You quit trying to change my mind; I don't even like tapeworms!

Speaking of which, I have to take my hat off to the brilliant, unfathomable innovation of the Japanese; apparently, Valentine's Day doesn't have to be the conventional, rabu-rabu occasion anymore. People actually fancy worms and such, or about to! Look at how disgusting these cookies are, but it is indeed rather intriguing. I wonder if the insects are real or simply gummies. Can you imagine their body fluids and bits rolling about in your mouth whereas the cookie simply crumbles? 

What are the odds of keeping the relationship with an idea like that? I can't speak for everybody else, but I like to think that the couple probably wouldn't last past the unfolding of the napkins. Unless both harbour the same quiet perversion that longs for some overdue approval. But no thanks, I would rather not bond intimately with something so gut-wrenching. Oh, insects also love cake as much as the average human does.

Gosh, I don't want to know what went into that cocktail, though the onee-san is totally unperturbed. What a way to celebrate Valentine's Day in style! Maybe you should offer yourself to be used as an ingredient for one of those things. According to some findings, worms are rich in protein or something. Yeah, then you will really disappear! Ah, I think that I could use some plain old chocolate now! Happy Singles' Day, if you haven't known already!

Eccentrically Yours.

Written by J.Fluffysheep ♪

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